Well after this post the day got interesting. I went to work and just did my thing all day. Sent Scumbag a message like I had planned and I just pretended like I didn't know anything was going on. He agreed to get together with me later in the day.
Then more messages from Blondie, all his things in the hallway ready to move. She's sad and in a panic.
Then more messages, they talked, they made up, he apologized, he agreed to keep paying rent for a few months and they were OK, but he was still moving out.
I told her "you guys are making me crazy, I need a nap".
Scumbag shows up at our house around 5:00pm. Tells Jeckyll and I about his moving in with the crazy stalker girl. Into her basement for $50 a month. We both laugh right in his face. Smart move, living with someone who has been stalking you. I tell him it's not too late. He says he's made up his mind. He knows he's probably doing something really stupid but he likes to "keep things interesting".
Turns out he doesn't really have time to hang out with me because the U-Haul hasn't been unloaded yet, it's at the new place. Here's what I find out in about 60 seconds.
1. He's never been there, has no idea what he's moving into.
2. Crazy girl rented the U-Haul for him, and paid for it, and helped him move everything.
3. He has to go unload it because it needs to get back to the rental place by 6:30. By now it's about 5:15 and we're half a mile away.
So what do I decide to do? I walk over there with him and help. I figure I want to know where the place is, I want to see what he's getting into. I know he has almost no belongings and it won't take any time at all to move his shit. I know if I show up at Crazy Girls place with him it will probably piss her off, especially when we're done moving stuff and he and I walk off into the day to go hang out, without her. Sometimes I'm not a very nice person, and I don't like her, and I want her to know I'm watching out for him. Mama bear doesn't like this one little bit.
So as we're getting close he says, "how much you wanna bet she already got everything out of the U-Haul for me". I said I'm not taking that bet.
Sure enough, we arrive and she's already, by herself, moved almost all of his things into the living room for him. Sure enough, she tentatively says hello to me but is also kind of giving me the stink-eye. Kitty wins.
I help him move it all into the basement, and let me say, it's just a basement. Concrete floor and walls, one dirty transom window, cobwebs, narrow stairs, bare lightbulbs, and a concrete sink. Total 1920's duplex. Musty smelling, dusty. The only nice thing I can say was it had the furnace so it's at least warm and dry. He stands in the middle of it looking around and says, "this is awesome, I like it". I tell him it's horrible and he's an idiot. He says, "well that's because you have standards, and I don't". Touche.
I want to see how far he can push this with her. I whisper in his ear, "you should try and get her to return the U-Haul for you so we can go play pool. I don't want to go all the way over to 37th, it's raining too hard now".
I know, I'm a horrible person.
He does it. He asks her to return it and gives her $10 for cab fare back from the rental place. She agrees to do it. I see the next several weeks of him just walking all over her. He claims he's not going to, but he knows he can. He's going to wring her dry.
So we spent the rest of the evening bouncing around a couple different bars. I made fun of him all night and he took it like a champ. We met back up with Jeckyll and some other people later in the evening. Eventually ran into Blondie at a party and I told her about his awesome new basement. She's turned around and is actually glad now he moved out. She said it will be good for her to not be so close to his insanity. I think the bulimia was getting bad.
One thing he did admit was he wanted to live someplace where it "wouldn't be so easy to throw up". He knows if he feels uncomfortable doing it in a certain situation, he won't. He'll meditate his way out of it. I told him that's called a geographical cure and it usually only works temporarily. He's trying to be mindful of it. He's biding time until his mom moves up here, but that's still months away.
I give it about three weeks before something weird happens at the new place. I told him I'd rescue him in the middle of the night if he needed it, but I made it clear if things don't work out there he cannot come live with us, he'll have to beg Blondie to take him back. So now I get to just sit back and watch what happens next. It's fun.
Monday, March 4, 2013
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It sounds like too much for me. I know he devalues himself. It's a shame.
ReplyDeleteWow, very, very intense. I haven't been blogging much or following blogs. It is amazing the decisions we make at that age; that some of us make much later in life, too.
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